Firstly, with the results of sleuthing on the Internet are some funnies from Debby Gies followed by some jokes from Sally.

D.G. Writes is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.

Thanks to Debby for finding these treasures… please give her a round of applause..

D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK    Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads:D.G. Kaye on Goodreads –  Twitter: @pokercubster

Check out Debby’s series here on Smorgasbord  D.G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships 2020

Now for a joke or two from Sally.

Complaints

A man joins a Trappist order and is told that he is allowed to say just two words every five years. After five years he speaks his two words to his superiors. ‘Bed hard’.

He is promised…

The Lake District National Park Authority held a Visitor Poll on the 30th and 31st of May. They asked interesting questions.

Before your visit which of the following things did you do?
Use the LDNPA website to check how busy areas were.  35.5%

Plan your destination AND end up at that destination.  38.7%

Plan your destination AND change your plan enroute. 55.1%

Use social media to research your visit.    43.4%

Bring a picnic and refreshments.    42.2%

Bring a BBQ.    25.8%

Bring alcohol.    70.3%

Then they asked them; before your visit, which of the following things were you aware of.

Not all car parks are open.      58.2%

Not all toilets are open.     70.3%

Most shops are closed.  74.6%

Most food businesses are closed.  39.5%

Local people are worried about visitors not respecting social distancing.  86.7%

You should take your litter home.  34.4%

You should follow the Country Code.  12.5%

You should…

Delighted to welcome a new author to the Cafe and Bookstore, Ann Patras with her memoirs of life in Africa. I am going to feature the first book in the series, Into Africa: With 3 Kids, 13 Crates and a Husband,  to introduce Ann and her story, and there are two follow up books, with the most recent published on January 11th 2020.

About the book

When Ann and Ziggy Patras uproot from England in 1980 and head off with their three young children to live and work in deepest Africa, they have no idea what they are letting themselves in for.

While prepared for sunshine and storms 13º south of the equator, the Patras family are ill-equipped for much else.

Interspersed with snippets from Ann’s letters home, this crazy story describes encounters ranging from lizards to lions, servants to shopping shortages, and cockroaches to curfews.

One of the…