I wrote this a few years ago and posted it on a Writers’ website I belonged to at the time. A thread on my favourite Facebook Group – We Love Memoirs – brought it back to mind today, so I thought I’d share it with you until I get around to posting something ‘proper’.
As you might imagine I have been incredibly busy of late, with the release of Into Africa. HAVE YOU BOUGHT YOUR COPY YET?
Anyway, here’s my little ditty.
Here is a story to be told, it happened to our Mummy.
She’s still quite cross about it all, but we thought it was funny.
Our Daddy had an accident, he nearly burnt the fryer
He put the pan outside to cool, but should have put it higher.
Next morning our dog King got up and thought it was his birthday
From head-in-pan his fur stuck up, like Mummy’s real bad-hair-day.
You see, he’d licked the pan all out and cos it was so greasy
His head and shoulders got oiled up – it wouldn’t come off easy.
Mum thought she’d better bath the dog but he was dead against it.
He leapt right out, jumped on her bed, and absolutely drenched it.
And then he ran into the yard and jumped amongst the flowers
Whilst Mummy stayed inside to clean – she said it took her hours.
My brother said “Let’s go and play.” So off we went to Peter’s
His Mum was buying ice-cream cones and said that she would treat us.
I didn’t know my brother Tim had left our gate wide open
The dog came out to track us down, well that’s what he was hopin’.
‘Twas only some time later on, we noticed King was missing
Our neighbour said he’d seen him trotting past, when he was fishing.
With everyone out calling him, on bikes, in cars and trucks
We found him by the pig-farm road, all covered up in muck.
But by the time we all got home the day had turned to night.
When we walked in our Mum just screamed “My goodness, what a sight.”
What happened next was quite a scene, now Daddy’s broken hearted.
He said that Mum must bath the dog. That’s when the big fight started.